Reflecting back on 2016 I’ve realized many things, a majority of which are filled with my utmost feelings of regret. Not in a bad way, but in a way that makes me disappointed in myself. I’m disappointed that I didn’t go after the things I wanted simply because I was scared or because other options seemed more opportunistic. However, I’ve come to find that where I am is not where I’m meant to be. As much as I’ve tried to convince myself that this is my path and that I can’t go back now, I’ve realized how incredibly naive that mindset is. Paths are overgrown, meandering trails that weave in and out of one another and branch off to create an extensive network. Their imperfections make them so incredibly unique. So, be as it may, I’m not stuck in one direction. My path doesn’t have to be perfect or straight. I don’t have to turn back, I can continue on and find a way to get to my next destination through other means.
In lieu of staying where I find I don’t fit in, I’ve decided to look into other schools. I’m currently studying to become a business major, but other passions have driven me to look elsewhere. Public service and global studies, classes I had originally signed up for due to course requirements, have urged me to look beyond the scope of myself. The world has so much to offer, yet I’ve grown up in a community sheltered from the hardships people face right outside the town’s boundaries. Although I don’t have as much money as my peers who dare to travel far and wide, I have hope that one day I will be able to make an impact without the expenses. This is why I have made the executive decision to transfer in hopes that I can pursue my love for the environment and different cultures and pass that passion onto others (especially if it means it’s at a lower price).
In just eight short days, I’ve managed to motivate and spin my life around completely. If you’d asked me two weeks ago what my plans were for next year, I would’ve given you an entirely different answer than I will now. This is why I think New Year’s resolutions are so subjective and trivial. They’re based on feelings during that current moment in time. Throughout the year things change and people change, therefore resolutions change. It’s good to have goals, in fact I highly encourage them, but people need to also be aware that life gets in the way. It’s okay if you veer off the path you had originally set out on!
Every holiday my family gets together and, over the course of our meal, we pose a question in honor of my Pop who unfortunately passed away last July. At the Thanksgiving dinner table my dad asked us: what is something that scares you, but also something you hope to do? My mom started off by saying she’s always wanted to go skydiving, but has never been able to build up the courage. Four short weeks later, she opened a present from her sister for Christmas: two tickets to go skydiving. A little hesitant, but also excited, my mom took the tickets thankfully. She’s now set to do something that terrifies her, but also brings her joy. Her gusto and charisma have inspired me to go after what I want and not sit idly by as my life continues on.
So this year I am devoted to living a life of pursuance, not directed towards anything specific except being the best, happiest version of myself that I can be. Now I call on you, whoever’s reading this. Do what makes you happy, even if it scares you.
– Corinne xx